An old man, bent double with age and toil, was gathering sticks in a forest. At last he grew so tired and hopeless that he threw down the bundle of sticks, and cried out; “I cannot bear this life any longer, Death come and take me!”
As he spoke, Death appeared and said to him: “What do you want old man?” “I heard you call me.”
“Please, Sir,” replied the old man, “would you kindly help me lift this load of sticks on to my shoulder?”
The tongue possesses immense power to shape reality, acting as a tool for either destruction or healing, life or death, yet, unfortunate to say, we mostly take this for granted. We think we can speak whatever we want to speak and escape with it. Alas, the world doesn’t work like that. Every word we speak carries weight. The earlier we realize this the better.
I feel like dying.
You will one day kill me.
Those are the words common nowadays. We believe they mean nothing. It is just a pass time. We are wrong. Words carry weight. They are fatal if used badly. Be careful. Your tongue can destroy you. Yet, in the same vein, it can heal you. Use it in the right way, and the whole of your reality will become positive and brighter. Let the weak say, “I am strong,” the bible says. Words kill. Words give life. They are either poison or fruit. We must choose. And there is no neutrality here. We are either on the right or the left. Nothing in the middle. The true test of a man’s spirituality is his ability to bridle his tongue, said R. Kent Hughes. Once we realize the power of the tongue, we won’t say just anything. Once we realize words carry meaning, we will pay much attention to the thoughts we think. For whatever we think, chances are we speak. Lest like the old man we call upon death, and yet when he comes, we are afraid of him.
Your tongue may be small, but it carries incredible power. If you fail to tame it, you will be sorry. The earlier you realize this the better. I have seen marriages dismantle. Empires collapse. Leaders fall. And communities going to war with each other. Just for one reason- misuse of the tongue. History is full of examples of men, careless with their words, dragged nations into war at the most peaceful of times.
Kaiser William of German, dragged Germany into a very useless and vain war- The 1st World War- just because he failed to tame his mouth. He uttered words at a time of peace that sent shivers around Europe, and, in fact, the whole world. His careless chatter triggered a war that not only cost him his throne, but also claimed millions, and millions of mostly innocent precious lives. By loudly boasting about the Germany navy superiority, German’s ability to subdue any nation on earth- in this case, indirectly referring to Britain and her allies- the Kaiser stirred a volcano of strife, anger, intrigue, hostility, and an incurable desire among his long-dormant fiercest enemies to prove his words wrong. Kaiser’s words may not have been the immediate cause of the War. But history insists there would be a completely different situation had the king a little bridled his tongue and tamed his vain ego. He uttered words no sensible diplomat and leader would dare speak at such times of peace. And yet, funny to say, he never wanted to take responsibility. Remember, he had earlier dismissed the crafty Bismarck as chancellor- a man whose advice and experience he could have highly relied upon at such delicate times. After realizing the fatality of the words he spoke, he advised his new chancellor to take responsibility. To say he was the one, not Kaiser, who spoke such garbage. The chancellor refused. You can imagine the drama that unfolded.
In marriages, a wife secretly swears to her friends how her husband is the most useless man on earth she has ever seen. Yet, in return, she expects love and care from him. After all, she is just venting her anger and disappointments. The husband is not hearing- no harm. Wrong! The words we speak will never go in vain like that. Slowly-but-surely, as though by magic, the bad husband turns worse. Then even worst. And you will never even know you played a part in it. It is your tongue, woman. Because you were bitter, you trusted your tongue, and yet that was the best time to remain silent. If there is anything I have learnt and put to heart in this world, it is never to trust my tongue at times when my heart is bitter. For it is at such times that my tongue can become the worst of traitors. The flood of disaster. And the virus that even the best doctor can’t cure. Yet many of us undermine this fact. We are mostly even unaware of it. When bitter, it is best to stay silent. Until you heal. You see, in as much as we say the tongue has no bones, YES, I agree, but it is strong enough to break hearts. Be careful with your words. It is the wisest choice you will ever make. Of course it is easier said than done, you will say. You are right. I, too, have stumbled a lot. But the fact that I am aware of it sometimes helps me to fight on. Good things are worth fighting for. They won’t come easy, anyway. Why risk your marriage just because you can’t shut up? We all fear fire. We arbor swords. We know they are destructive. I want to assure you these two are slow engines of destruction when compared to an untamed tongue. Get time and visit divorce courts these days. They are full. The judges rarely have space to breathe. Divorce rates are at their peak. And you know what? The reasons for this may not be what you are thinking. The main reason for divorce today is not violence. It is not infidelity. It is not that the partners cannot just love each other anymore. The deepest root cause for separation is miscommunication and poor communication. Husbands speaking to their wives like they don’t matter. Wives throwing venomous words at their husbands to undermine their status as natural leaders and protectors. You can see how unfortunate this is. Better to avoid it early.
You exaggerate things, Musa, You will say.
That just can’t be true.
Keep on. Speak whatever careless word you feel like. And you will be a living testimony and martyr- only for the wrong reason.
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